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GROUNDED GUIDANCE: PEOPLE, PLEASE

Why do some people choose to lock themselves into a life of unhappy service just to make others like them or to avoid that dreaded word—conflict? I, myself, love healthy conflict. It helps me and those dear to me grow. The truth behind the conflict is that those involved are experiencing resistance on the conversation or issue.

Why do some people choose to lock themselves into a life of unhappy service just to make others like them or to avoid that dreaded word—conflict? I, myself, love healthy conflict. It helps me and those dear to me grow. The truth behind the conflict is that those involved are experiencing resistance on the conversation or issue. The only difference is that I don’t care if people like me. I care if I like me and I always make sure to see if my truth is being presented in a clear, compassionate way. People pleasers are so afraid of not being liked that they would rather toss themselves under the bus and abandon their truth just for a moment of feeling that they are liked. Instead, all that happens is that, while they dog the proverbial conflict, they beat themselves up later.

When you don’t honor your core truth, you unconsciously hold yourself back from manifesting desired outcomes. It’s more important to establish a clear, concise way of delivering the truth with compassion. I love that word—compassion. Have you witnessed someone else in people-pleasing mode and it made you want to scream and pull your hair out? It’s annoying and makes you feel like you’re being lied to on a deeper level. Even though you may not know what level, your soul does. If you people please, there are bound to be moments where your true colors shine through. If you’re on the receiving end of this madness, you will feel caught off-guard and wonder why your loved one is snapping at you. One, it’s because they’ve had enough. Two, it’s because you’re safe and they know you won’t leave them or be upset for too long. Three is the really good one—it feels good to them to have someone to take it out on.

If you’re the person snapping, it may be because you feel like no one appreciates what you do for them or cares about your feelings. You might feel tired and drained and have recurring headaches. You may throw temper tantrums and cut people off quickly. Burning bridges may become second nature. Why all the drama? Simply because you did not speak your truth and instead people pleased. You may think you avoided conflict but all you did was increase it tenfold. The universe will keep bringing more people for you to please until you stand in your power. Not as punishment, but to help you grow.

It takes a lot out of the human body—physically, mentally and spiritually—to keep lying to your soul. Source wants you to be powerful and truthful, living only expressions of love and creativity. Instead of people pleasing, spend more time praising yourself and telling yourself how amazing you are, and acknowledging every success, big and small, you have in life. Letting people know the truth sets them free from illusion and gives you both a clear path to a truthful relationship.

Remember to spend more time reminding yourself daily what a good person you are. You will fill yourself up with powerful information and the need to be liked will fade. Best of all, you will create a more honest life for yourself on this planet. Everyone around you will grow and you will feel good inside. That, my dear ones, is the most important lesson of the day: feel good about you.